Thursday, July 26, 2012

So stressed!!!!!

You know, I'm just over this all!!!!!
I was talking to my brother today and I was telling him, if it's not one thing it's always another.

People have their own opinions about things took place.  There is always more than one side to the story, but if you haven't heard the entire story how do you really know the truth.

I just spoke to my oldest sister tonight about a situation with me and a younger sister.  The situation between us could have been handled a little better, but I can't go back and change what happened.  If I could change what happened I would have hung up on her from the jump.  I don't try to play mama to children that are not mine.  But when I have concern about something, I will voice my opinion.  Whether it is in a private conversation or out in the open.

What people have to realize that is that outside of their self, other people have feelings as well.  So when you say certain things or make comments, don't expect for people to just sit back and listen all the time.  Do I apologize for what I said?  No.  Do I apologize for the manner in which I said it?  Yes.  In a calm setting, it would have definitely come out different.  Will me an my sister ever kiss and make up?  Who knows.  I leave on her.  I don't have a problem because the things that she does on a daily basis do not affect me or my children.  But when it does affect a sister, brother, or parent I will definitely let my opinion be known.

It seems as though when someone is not in the situation that they have their opinions about what happen and what should have happened.  That's all fine and dandy.  But don't take one side of the story and the person that usually plays the helpless victim is as much at fault as the other.

Like I told my sister on the phone, regardless what was said between the two of us, is she needs me, I'll be there for her.  Simple as that.  If I can help you I can and that goes for anyone that I know.  If I can help, I will.  No strings attached, but if it's dealing with money I want it back.

But the only thing that upsets me about this is that, when I get to the point to where I 'm not thinking about it as much, it is brought back up.  I'm not going to let this get me into a rut.  I'm not.  My step-mom can be pissed of it at me until the end of time, it doesn't matter, because I count on one hand the times that she has been there for me in 20yrs.  Being fake to get to know someone isn't cool and taken one daughters side over the others is not cool either.  Once she realizes those things, we might be ok.  Oh and one more thing I can't stand when someone is mad at me and they take it out my children.  Not once have I ever or will I ever stop speaking to my nieces or nephews because their mother or father and I get into it.  Not going to happen.  The children NEVER have anything to do with it.

I'm just over this mess.  Let bygones be bygones.  If you're going to talk to me, talk to me.  If not keep doing you, because that's what I'm going to do to take care of my family.  And it's like out of everything positive that was said, it is always turned into a negative.

But it is what it is right?


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